A Series of Unfortunate Events

I am a firm believer in giving hazard pay to mothers, or any pay to mothers for that matter :) This weekend was no exception. At the end of the evening I had to clean up poop, blood, and vomit. Gross, I know. The strange thing is that each bodily fluid was from a different body and all of this happened in under 10 minutes...

Jacob had been crabby all evening and was disobeying me right and left, so after bathtime I told him he had to go straight to bed without a story. This apparently was the cause of the tantrum of the century. He screamed so loud that Claire and Luke were a little scared. I got kicked in the face while trying to put him into bed.

While Jake was screaming I thought that I should distract myself so I wouldn't cave and let him out of bed. I figured I may as well give Luke a bath. Luke thought he may as well poop in his bath since he was getting cleaned up anyway. (hence, the aforementioned poop). Meanwhile, Jacob screamed so hard that he gagged himself and threw up in is bed. Great. I quickly wrapped up Luke in his towel and laid him down so I could go clean up Jacob and the bed. Luke was peeved because he was cold so he started screaming. Jacob was now screaming because he had throw up on him. Claire was wandering around the house oblivious to most of this, actually wondering what trouble she could cause, more likely. And she did. The sound of Jacob and Luke screaming masked the sound of Claire going through the trash. She found a can of fruit from dinner. I always put the lids inside the cans after having been cut on a can myself, but she apparently stuck her little finger into the can and cut the tip. She started whining, but I didn't even notice because of the screaming and the cleaning up of poop and vomit.

After I put a screaming Jacob back in bed and went to get Luke, I noticed that Claira's hands were bright red. I thought she had been into the ketchup ( I don't know how she could have, it just looked like that). I started to yell at her until I realized that there wasn't any ketchup out, but the fruit can was. Blood! EEK!!! I kicked it into gear to clean her up and see how bad the cut was. I was so scared. I think I've put one bandaid on the kids ever. Those finger wounds bleed a lot but the cut was thankfully very small. I sanitized, neosporined, and bandaged Claira.

Luke quit crying because he was enjoying seeing me run around like a crazy person. Jacob stopped crying because he heard that Claira was hurt and was actually very worried. Claira got a piece of candy, Luke got PJs, Jacob finally fell asleep. I thought, "Well, it can't get any worse" and then worried because you know you're not supposed to say that.